Hi Gary,
Long time listener here, thank you for your show. I listen to you at the gym when I work out, and the show minimizes the torture of working out. Anyway, I have been wanting to write to you forever, since our lives are very similar, MOT and all. But one subject I want to touch on is the passing of our parents. My Dad passed at 89 in 2010, and my Mom in 2022 at 97. Both were Brooklyners, who moved to Phoenix in 1956. Close to the same age as your parents, but the thing I want to impress upon you is to not to listen to the naysayers when you say you feel releived that it happened. We all gotta go sometime, and the key is to minimize the discomfort for all involved. I too, was out of town when my Mom passed. I had just brought her home from the hospital, and she was not on “death watch” at the time.
I checked with her care team, they knew that I had a trip planned, I asked if I should cancel, and they all said no. They told be she could live for 1 more day, 1 more week, 1 more month, 1 more year, etc. And knowing my Mom, the New Yorker that she was, she wasn’t going to go without a fight. She was actually in pretty good physical condition, her mind was still sharper than 95% of the planet (although that be a low bar), so I took my trip. When I left her that last time it was knowing that I might never see her again, but who knows? That stuff is way beyond my pay grade, so I enjoyed my trip going to Washington DC for the cherry tree Sakura. My Mom loved cherry trees, and I saw her in each tree while I drove around DC and VA. When I got the call, I was at Monticello in Charlottesville, VA, standing underneath a beatuiful cherry tree in full bloom. So I flew back home 4 days early, and buried Mom 3 days later. And I have zero regrets about being gone. I guess the moral of the story is that our loved ones are everywhere we are, we just got to look for them. And it is a relief when an elderly loved one passes, as no one knows what type of physical pain they might be in at the time. I am fortunate that I did not receive any grief from anyone, but if I would have, they would have been shot down. The loss evens out eventually, our lives return to normal, but we always should carry the memories with fondness and realism. Thanks again for your show and insights, and I wish you the best. Mazal Tov.
Hi Gary,
Long time listener here, thank you for your show. I listen to you at the gym when I work out, and the show minimizes the torture of working out. Anyway, I have been wanting to write to you forever, since our lives are very similar, MOT and all. But one subject I want to touch on is the passing of our parents. My Dad passed at 89 in 2010, and my Mom in 2022 at 97. Both were Brooklyners, who moved to Phoenix in 1956. Close to the same age as your parents, but the thing I want to impress upon you is to not to listen to the naysayers when you say you feel releived that it happened. We all gotta go sometime, and the key is to minimize the discomfort for all involved. I too, was out of town when my Mom passed. I had just brought her home from the hospital, and she was not on “death watch” at the time.
I checked with her care team, they knew that I had a trip planned, I asked if I should cancel, and they all said no. They told be she could live for 1 more day, 1 more week, 1 more month, 1 more year, etc. And knowing my Mom, the New Yorker that she was, she wasn’t going to go without a fight. She was actually in pretty good physical condition, her mind was still sharper than 95% of the planet (although that be a low bar), so I took my trip. When I left her that last time it was knowing that I might never see her again, but who knows? That stuff is way beyond my pay grade, so I enjoyed my trip going to Washington DC for the cherry tree Sakura. My Mom loved cherry trees, and I saw her in each tree while I drove around DC and VA. When I got the call, I was at Monticello in Charlottesville, VA, standing underneath a beatuiful cherry tree in full bloom. So I flew back home 4 days early, and buried Mom 3 days later. And I have zero regrets about being gone. I guess the moral of the story is that our loved ones are everywhere we are, we just got to look for them. And it is a relief when an elderly loved one passes, as no one knows what type of physical pain they might be in at the time. I am fortunate that I did not receive any grief from anyone, but if I would have, they would have been shot down. The loss evens out eventually, our lives return to normal, but we always should carry the memories with fondness and realism. Thanks again for your show and insights, and I wish you the best. Mazal Tov.